


Streaking

by iloveitblue



Series: Prompts [113]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-20
Updated: 2015-02-04
Packaged: 2018-02-21 22:32:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2484686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iloveitblue/pseuds/iloveitblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The one where Phil is drunk and Clint and Tony are dead men walking.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> They didn’t think it was possible.

Besides, it wasn’t supposed to be this bad. Phil was even slurring. All Clint and Tony had wanted to do was to see what kind of drunk Phil would be… And it was hilarious!

For the first 20 minutes at least.

The next 30 minutes, not so much…

—-

Clint and Tony ran down the halls and stopped at every door, checking every room and every sub hall they ran into. Tony even had Cap on his phone. 

"You what?!" Tony kept the phone away from his ear. He wondered for a second if the serum had an effect on Steve’s voice modulation then he shook his head, this wasn’t the time.

"Look Cap, I can’t exactly show you a point per point presentation on this right now but I swear-"

"I’m on my way." Steve said and the line went dead.

Crap.

If Steve was on his way then Natasha was sure to be informed about it now. They were  _so_  dead.

Tony cursed at his phone and Clint looked over at him. “What?”

"Steve’s on his way."

"Crap. That means-"

"Exactly."

"Means we gotta find him fast."

—-

It only took Steve 5 minutes to catch up with them. Well, given that he was already in the Helicarrier in the first place, it wasn’t really that impressive.

"Have you found him?" Steve asked even before they were face to face.

"No. Did you tell Natasha?" Tony supplied.

"What? No. Do you think I’m crazy? She’d kick your asses more than you deserve… Although there will be words about this later."

Both Clint and Tony let out a sigh of relief. 

"Now come on. We’ve gotta find him." Steve urged.

—-

They later passed Agent Hill who stood frozen in the corridor. Clint ran up to her almost as soon as he saw her.

"Where’d he go?" The archer knew he didn’t even had to tell her who he’s talking about.

Hill shook her head then blinked for a little while, like she was trying to get her consciousness back. “I- He- Why was he naked?”

"Phil’s naked?!" Clint had to ask.

"We are so dead. Not even Heimdall can help us hide now." Tony groaned.

"Where did he go?" Steve asked.

"Down the hall. Just a moments ago." Hill told them, then she smirked. 

"Thanks." Clint called out over his shoulder as he ran down the hall.

—-

He wasn’t down the hall. In fact, he wasn’t at anywhere in the Helicarrier. They searched. Steve made the call to head back to Phil’s office on deck and regroup. Maybe strategizing would help them find Phil.

Clint walked through the door and froze making Tony bump into him and Steve into Tony. 

Natasha sat on the desk, her legs crossed and filing her nails. “Hello boys.” she said with an evil smile. “You’ll never guess who I found streaking through the Helicarrier.” she jumped off of the desk and made her way behind the desk. “or maybe you do.” She turned the swivel chair that was originally facing the wall to find a sleeping Phil. “Seriously Clint. You have to take better care of your boyfriend here.”

Clint swallowed, they were in so much trouble. Natasha didn’t miss it, she grinned like cat. 

"Well, My work here is done." Natasha strode the room to make her way out. 

"Wait. you’re not going to kill us?" Tony asked, which was so very unnecessary. 

"Nope." She said happily, making the ‘p’ pop. "I’ll let Phil do that. I’m sure he can think of a punishment suitable for the crime much better than I can"

Both guys’ eyes widened and color slowly drained their faces.

"Oh dear Lord."

"Fuck." 

They both whispered.

Phil groaned and they both flinched.

Natasha grinned even harder. “Good luck.”


	2. Chapter 2

Phil groaned and he opened his eyes with more difficulty than usual. As he did, he caught the tail end of a whispered conversation that was likely between Tony and Clint.

"-old you. We should get out of here while we can."

"I’m not leaving him like this, Stark."

"He’s going to kill us! Do you not see the problem here?"

"I’m still not leaving."

"Look, I can get us to the Caribbean in an hour. We’ll slum it there for a few days until this whole thing blows over. And when we come back, he’ll just be happy that we’re not actually dead."

"What exactly is your definition of ‘slumming it’, Tony?"

"Sssh! He’s waking up! He’s waking up!"

Phil blinked a few more times before his eyes focused on Clint. He forced himself to look around the room and found out that he was in his office. Tony Stark stood in front of his desk and Captain Rogers was sitting on the couch, reading a magazine. 

The archer smiled down at him worriedly. “Hi Phil. You feeling okay?”

Phil straightened himself on his chair before a pounding headache made him give up on that endeavor. 

"What- What happened?"

Clint turned to look at Tony and Tony turned to look at Clint. They both wore faces closely associated with fear and worry. “I- uh- You see-” Clint started.

"The thing about that is- is that-" Tony tried.

"They both got you drunk and you went streaking all over the office." Steve answered, not looking up from his magazine.

"TRAITOR!" Tony yelled, pointing at Steve. Phil had to shut his eyes at that. Shouting at this time of day was not ideal. 

Wait a minute. 

Did Steve just say Phil went streaking all over the office? 

Suddenly, all signs of headache seemed irrelevant. “I did what?”

"Streaking. Natasha found you before you managed to get to the labs and took you back here. She says she’ll leave the punishments to you." Steve answered once again.

"I suppose you’re not involved in any of this, Captain?" Phil asked.

"I tried helping look for you after these two lost you, but Natasha found you first." Steve started writing on the magazine, the crossword puzzle, probably. "Hey, what’s a seven letter word for double-crosser?"

"Traitor." Both Clint and Tony answered, sending Steve glares that seemed to go over his head.

"Thanks."

Phil sighed. “What made you think getting me drunk was a good idea?”

"We weren’t really thinking." Clint answered.

"Right. Go on then. To the hall. Both of you." Phil shooed them, following despite the massive headache.

—-

"I told you we should’ve escaped to the Caribbean." Tony hissed.

"Shut up, Tony." Clint hissed back. 

"Did I say you can talk? Count, men."

"35, 36, 37…" Tony and Clint resumed counting as they  ~~walked~~  waddled like ducks - sitting on their calves - while their hands rested behind their heads along the halls of HQ. 

"Count louder! You’re going to go through all the places I ran through waddling." Phil announced.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Here on tumblr](http://promptmephlint.tumblr.com/post/110084806261/ive-started-playing-marvels-contest-of)

**Author's Note:**

> [Here on tumblr](http://promptmephlint.tumblr.com/post/100505399151/i-am-procrastinating-i-should-probably-work-on)


End file.
